"The most powerless I've ever felt about my physical appearance.": An Interview with Lacie Rodriguez

Lacie Rodriguez, known for her social media presence, is also a source of inspiration within the online community for female hair loss.

Her journey began in college when depression and anxiety triggered her hair loss. Hair toppers became her unexpected lifeline, restoring her confidence. But her story goes beyond external solutions.

Lacie emphasizes the link between outer appearance and inner well-being, advocating that addressing hair loss can foster inner wholeness.

She candidly shares her battle with depression and anxiety since middle school, highlighting resilience and self-acceptance. Lacie's story is a reminder that our worth transcends physical appearance, offering valuable contributions to the world. 
 

We appreciate your being here! To start, our readers are interested in learning more about you. Could you tell us a bit about your “backstory"? We are also interested in hearing about your journey. 

Born in Utah for most of my life, mostly in small towns. I have been married for almost 14 years and have three children, ages 12, 9, and 4. I do various things on my own, but primarily focus on content creation for social media.I began creating makeup tutorials and selling makeup. I also work within the online community for female hair loss. When discussing my journey, I presume you are referring to my experience with hair loss.

Can you tell us more about your experience with hair loss? 

In my journey, I've come to appreciate how hair loss can serve as a catalyst for deeper self-reflection. Insecurities are something we all grapple with, regardless of gender. However, it often feels like society places greater emphasis on a woman's physical appearance, making it challenging to break free from this narrative. 

Throughout my life, my physical appearance has been a significant source of personal struggle, requiring extensive inner work. Losing my hair at the age of 19 during a particularly stressful period in college was a profound experience. It triggered a deep depression and anxiety, which I believe played a role in the onset of androgenic alopecia, a form of genetic hair loss. 

This experience was utterly devastating. It wasn't just about losing hair; it extended to a broader sense of insecurity about my body and various aspects of my life. Hair loss, in particular, made me feel utterly powerless. 

However, it was during this challenging period that I made a significant discovery—hair toppers. Contrary to the misconception that they are used to hide hair loss, for me, they became a source of empowerment. Finding a hair topper that worked effectively allowed me to step out into the world with newfound confidence, without constantly worrying about my hair. 

  
 

Can you tell me more about how external factors can contribute to achieving inner wholeness? 

It's hard to verbalize, but many women have had the same experience. Hair loss is the most powerless I've ever felt about my physical appearance. With my body, I knew I had some power, but with my hair, I felt totally powerless. The doctor told me it's genetic and there's no solution. It was devastating. When I found hair toppers, I felt empowered again. It was my decision whether or not to have a full head of hair. Now, I rarely wear hair toppers. It doesn't make me feel any better or more deserving. I've realized that my worth as a human being is not tied to my physical appearance.  

However there are some days I don't care about my appearance, while other days I feel insecure. But those moments are becoming less frequent. When I catch myself being negative, I ask if I would say those things to my daughter or other women. I try to be kind to myself. I like the analogy that a $20 bill has the same value, whether it's new or old. My worth is not determined by my appearance.I have so much more to offer the world. I no longer attach my worth to what I look like. It's been a huge turnaround. 

  

The analogy about money is very insightful. You mentioned experiencing depression and anxiety. Can you please share when these feelings first started? 

In middle school, I started going to therapy because my dad noticed I slept a lot and thought something was wrong. I was diagnosed with depression and tried many medications in high school, but didn't find one that worked well for me. I also experienced anxiety, but didn't realize it at the beginning. I had a perfectionism mindset and always felt like I wasn't good enough. After high school, I pushed myself too hard and burned out.

College overwhelmed me with new responsibilities and bills. Going into a prestigious university, I wasn't prepared and spiraled into depression and anxiety. I started therapy and took medication for a while. I've had postpartum depression and anxiety after my daughters. However, I've been in a good mental health state for several years now. Therapy, the right support system, and learning how manage myself have all contributed. I now know my limits, take care of myself, set boundaries, heal relationships, and improve communication. It's been a combination of many things that have helped me reach this good place. 

Have you ever experienced emotions that made it difficult to motivate yourself or get out of bed? 

James, I want to share something with you. I grew up in an abusive home. My dad was a monster and I experienced a lot of abuse. It was really rough for me. My parents had an unstable relationship throughout my childhood. My mom was always on the verge of a breakdown. I knew I couldn't be a burden to her. I had to protect her. Sorry, I'm getting emotional. 

Don't be sorry . You don't need to apologize for your emotions. 

It took me a long time, but I finally learned. I experienced depression, anxiety, and a fear of being alone. I would stay in bed all day, avoiding my issues and responsibilities. It was a lot of work, but I've made progress. I pushed everything down because I didn't want my mom's life or worry about me. My dad never respected my feelings, it was always about him. My siblings and I learned not make things harder for anyone and protect our mom. We took on adult responsibilities as kids. Childhood trauma included fear of anger because of my dad's anger. It took me a while, but I now understand that anger and conflict is part of life.  

How do you handle conflict? Does it scare you? How do you manage it? And how does it make you feel compared to before? 

In the past I avoided it at all costs. I mean, it would take a lot for me to face any kind of conflict. And it was normally after I have, you know, pushed it down, pushed it down so long to the point then I explode and that happens. It still happens sometimes, but it's never quite as bad because I really try to pay attention, you know, like when people say like, don't sweat the small stuff and like, you know, pick your battles, those kinds of things. I used to take... to the point where I would pick no battles and I would sweat nothing because I didn't wanna fight about anything. 

And now I have to really think, is this really something small or is it really affecting me? And I just think it should be small. And I really have to try to face those things early on. I'm also really big about proactively avoiding conflict. So. like setting boundaries before there's even a chance for conflict, that's worked really well for me in any kind of relationship or situation where I try really hard to think about like, where could this go wrong? Like where are all these outlets where this could go wrong? And let's try to plug them now so that there's no chance of us fighting about this later.

So that's worked really well too, but I still hate conflict. I'm never gonna like conflict. It still makes me super uncomfortable, still breaks my heart when I feel like I'm hurting somebody just for standing up for myself. Like it's still super hard, but I'm not as afraid of it as I used to be. 

Do you ever get angry? Please share your thoughts on how you manage it. 

I'm a pretty passionate person. And I think anytime I just have this, I'm just a very, you know, I feel things really deeply. And so anger is one of them and I do, I get really angry. And in the past, I would just, I was so afraid of anger. I was afraid of doing something I would regret or saying something I would regret. 

Emotions serve a purpose, including anger, which signals something is wrong. Ignoring anger is like ignoring the symptoms of a deadly disease, which can have serious consequences. I've learned to face my anger, dig deeper to understand its root cause. It's not usually about trivial things like socks on the floor, but about feeling unheard or unimportant. I've realized it's best to take a break when I'm really angry, allowing myself to regulate before addressing the conflict. In all relationships, including work, anger can be appropriate, but it's important to manage it constructively. I have helped a lot of women learn to do this. I have learned to use my anger as a tool, allowing it to motivate me rather than destroy the relationships I care about. 

 

In regards to your work with women, it is evident that you have had a significant impact, as many of them express admiration and gratitude for your efforts. Can you tell me more about how you support and empower these women and what creates a strong community around your work? 

I stumbled into this career unexpectedly. I have a deep emotional connection with people and easily make friends. Selling makeup was something I started on social media to regain my sense of self. I also discovered hair toppers around the same time. Initially, I thought it was a niche topic, but it made a big difference in my life, so I decided to share about it. Women started reaching out to me, wanting to know more. I began experimenting with different kinds of toppers and people would approach me for advice. 

Some people feel vain when they mourn their hair loss. It is normal to mourn the loss of hair. People often want a topper that looks very realistic. They want it to look natural. There are many factors to consider for a natural-looking topper. The biggest thing women are looking for is a one-on-one connection 

 
 

Lastly, what are your two or three tips for someone who is new to hair loss? Someone who hasn't had the Lacey Rodriguez experience may have limited knowledge about hair loss and may feel anxious as they start their journey. If you have any advice for someone who is new to hair care, please feel free to share. 

I always tell people to find community as soon as you possibly can. And a lot of women act like that seems childish. Like, you know, I'm not in high school anymore. I don't need like a girl gang. And that's really not what it is at all. But it's just finding that support system of women who've been through the same thing. And I don't know the magic of that is just incomparable. So finding these women and filling your social media feed really amazing women who are living a really fulfilling life and also have hair loss. Some of them don't even wear alternative hair and that's good to see too. You don't have to have alternative hair to live a happy life but some of us choose to wear it. So I would say that is a huge part of kind of shifting your perspective because a lot of us feel like when our hair is falling out that like, you know, the joy in life, the like that joy of going out and enjoying a night out is over. but it doesn't have to be. So I'd say finding community is first. 

The second thing is finding some kind of solution for you and that can be a million different things. Could be like shaving your head and just rocking like a bald look. There are some women, that's what they do and they feel really empowered by that and that's their choice of their solution, right? It doesn't have to be, of course, my solution is hair toppers and wigs. Like I love wearing hair when I wanna feel put together. You could just really double down on working with a doctor, a dermatologist, if you feel like that's going to help you in this journey, do it. Finding something to focus on that's within your control. That doesn't mean your hair's gonna magically grow back. You might, but it's usually just feeling like you're taking that power back. That I'm doing something about something that feels powerless. So finding some kind of solution for you to give you some of that power back. And then just... doing that inner work and sometimes that's therapy, sometimes that's just self care and getting really, really familiar with how you function and what your real needs are. And the more you work on that, the better you're gonna feel and the less you're gonna care about losing your hair. 

 

The Dimples Topper Lacie is wearing: Clio 14L French •Remy Human Hair  

 

Items Lacie uses to keep her Dimples Toppers long-lasting - COMBO PACK | Shampoo & Conditioner for Remy Human Hair